Why Do We Hate The Idea Of Being Single In Our Twenties?

There comes a time in your twenties when it feels like everyone is on the verge of settling down, shacking up and disappearing off the face of the earth.
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Reformation Maple Top, Zara Belted Trouser, Quay Desi Sunglasses, Sol Sana Parker | Stoleninspiration.com NZ Fashion & Travel Blogger

There comes a time in your twenties when it feels like everyone is on the verge of settling down, shacking up and disappearing off the face of the earth. Or, they’ve just fallen deep into “dicksand” (and if you don’t know – watch ‘How To Be Single’). When plans are ditched more than not and you’re left wondering where everyone went. That is for us single folk. Okay, maybe that’s a little melodramatic (I need to stop watching reruns of Sex In The City) but it is somewhat true.

It’s actually pretty ironic for me to be writing to you about *spoiler alert* being happily single in your twenties. I can already imagine my best friend reading this thinking “you literally complain about being single all the time”. Look, I’m the first to admit that yes, having someone to spoon when it’s cold sounds appealing. I’d even settle for someone making sure I made it home on a night out (and didn’t disappear, again). But it’s not enough to make me want to do anything about it. Sorry tinder, maybe next decade.

Reformation Maple Top, Zara Belted Trouser, Quay Desi Sunglasses, Sol Sana Parker | Stoleninspiration.com NZ Fashion & Travel BloggerReformation Maple Top, Zara Belted Trouser, Quay Desi Sunglasses, Sol Sana Parker | Stoleninspiration.com NZ Fashion & Travel Blogger

Reformation Maple Top, Zara Belted Trouser, Quay Desi Sunglasses, Sol Sana Parker | Stoleninspiration.com NZ Fashion & Travel Blogger

So why all of a sudden in your twenties do people consider ‘single’ as something that needs to be fixed? I couldn’t count how many people have offered to set me up with a ‘friend’ as soon as I mention the word. Then (cringing) I have to politely decline because (um, hell no) I’m actually not dating right now.

I guess in an attempt at grounding myself (AKA stay in one place for more than 5 minutes) I’ve been catching up with a heap of old friends – friends that have serious relationship-handbrake syndrome. You know the one: girl holds on to boyfriend because she’s too scared of being alone. Or my personal favourite “he doesn’t want to travel yet so I’m waiting”.  I’m not sure when being alone started to equal lonely, or why you’d need someone to hold your hand to do the things you want to do the most. Yes, sometimes it can be unsettling. Yes, even a little scary. But holding on to a sub-par relationship seems like an easy way to let your life pass you by.

Contrary to popular belief, I’m very happily single, and if you are you should enjoy it while you can. As my flat mate likes to remind me “it only takes one person to change that”. There’s no way I would have done half of the things I have at 24 if I had someone waiting at home to draw me back. I’ve been able to move to a new city every year, I’ve spent too much on clothes and change my mind at a moments notice. I’ve also woken up in places I’d rather forget about, made some super bad decisions and put myself in a lot of danger. And while these memories won’t probably be the most significant in my life, the freedom that allowed them is precious and limited. So why wouldn’t you enjoy being single and having some reckless fun while you can?

 

Top – Reformation

Pants – Zara (Similar Here)

Sunglasses – Quay x Desi Perkins

Shoes – Sol Sana (Similar Here)

 

Reformation Maple Top, Zara Belted Trouser, Quay Desi Sunglasses, Sol Sana Parker | Stoleninspiration.com NZ Fashion & Travel Blogger

Reformation Maple Top, Zara Belted Trouser, Quay Desi Sunglasses, Sol Sana Parker | Stoleninspiration.com NZ Fashion & Travel Blogger

 

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